Decreased sexual desire in females is common and it can also be known as hypoactive sexual desire disorder (HSDD).
The American Psychiatric Association defined HSDD as a deficiency or absence of sexual fantasies and desire for sexual activity that causes significant personal distress or interpersonal difficulties.
It is prevalent amongst 1 in 3 women throughout the lifespan and affects quality of life, physical and emotional satisfaction, and overall happiness.
Why Does Decreased Sexual Desire Happen?
Many factors can cause HSDD. Sometimes it is one factor but most of the time it is a cocktail of a few. The table below better explains.
Is my drop in libido worth addressing or should I just live with it?
First, let’s complete a quick screening. Answer these questions before moving on:
- In the past, was your level of sexual desire/interest good and satisfying to you?
- Has there been a decrease in your level of sexual desire/interest?
- Are you bothered by your decreased level of sexual desire/interest?
- Would you like your level of sexual desire/interest to increase?
If you answered yes to at least 2 of these questions, I suggest we address the decrease in sexual desire.
Who Can Help Me?
It can feel overwhelming when deciding who to go to when addressing a decrease in sexual desire because as shown above, it is multifactorial.
I suggest starting by seeing a pelvic health physical therapist.
A pelvic physical therapist is well versed in sexual dysfunction. They can treat you and can refer you to the right healthcare provider, if needed.
How To Start Increasing Your Sexual Desire
There are 3 major psychological components that affect sexual desire:
- Individual
- Interpersonal
- Societal
Women’s desire is more responsive to changes in the interpersonal dynamic.
Interpersonal includes:
- Responsiveness to partner
- Committing to confronting sexual desire issues that may arise
- Communication
- Sharing feelings, open communication about desire discrepancy
- Emotional intimacy
- Touching and memories of partner
- Self expansion
- Trying new things
Try to use these nuggets of knowledge and explore how you feel after. For example, to improve emotional intimacy you may ask your partner for a massage or offer them one with no end goal in mind.
Decreased sexual desire is not a lost cause, it just takes a little bit of understanding, exploration, and gentle guidance from a pelvic physical therapist.
Inez Gonzalez
Books To Get You Started
- Come As You Are by Emily Nagoski
- She speaks about the psychological impact on sexual desire.
- The Body Is Not An Apology by Sonya Renee Taylow
- She speaks about awakening love for the body and dismantling shame creed by society